Feelings are terrible.
- Me: I thought feelings like this were supposed to be good and make you feel good and fantastic and wonderful. Feelings like this just cause me to have a nervous breakdown about how many different ways I suck.
- Friend: How does this mean you suck?
- Me: I was under the impression that being a selfish asshole means you suck. I mean, I don't think being a selfish asshole means I suck, I like being a selfish asshole, but that's the impression I get from others.